priests and homework

Been doing a ton of research lately. Final papers and exams are here. I have TWO 15-page research papers due a week from tomorrow, also two take-home exams and two sitting exams for the following week.

Today I was at the library at St. John's Seminary. (Sometimes my life really surprises me, you know? Today I hung out at the Seminary!? wtf... two years ago I'd have died laughing at the suggestion.)

Well, I found myself in the vicinity of the youngest priest I have ever, ever seen. This kid had to have been about 23. He was baby-faced, and had this innocence, this total lack of worldliness, about him. I couldn't stop staring at him. All in black, collar and everything. At an age where most of his peers are out on a seemingly endless bender, scouting around for a piece, and skipping class, this kid is on his way to hearing confessions and presiding over the eucharist. It really floored me. At the thought of calling him "Father," I lost my mind. I crossed the room the long way to avoid having to greet him, in case I choked on the word...

There are, really, so many priests in my department. I haven't been around so many unavailable men since my days as a fag hag in college. When I said I was hoping I'd meet more guys up here, this is not what I had in mind!

Anyway, what am I up to? Research... Research and studying the Church... Surrounded by people OF the Church. Church Church Church! Aack!

For a while once, I waited tables at a Mexican restaurant. Some days, I would say to myself, Whew! If I see one more tortilla chip, I think I'll scream! Much the same, I'm ready for a bit of a break from God and the Church and the Catechism and Vatican II and ALL of it. I'm DONE. Am I gonna join a cult in rebellion? Not likely. But am I anxious to discuss the meaning of life and salvation over a cup of tea? No way. I'm taking suggestions for trivial and mindless pursuits for my vacation.

Emergency.

I was in a public restroom... you know alot of good stories start with this openning, right? So in the restroom, I was drying my hands and I looked at the paper towel dispenser. There was a little red dial on the side. It said, "Emergency towel dispenser." I almost passed out. Apparently, you can swivel this little red dial and get paper towels. Great. I hate paper towel jams as much as the next guy. But the label seemed a little incendiary. Big red letters... EMERGENCY! "Quick... GET THE PAPER TOWELS! It's an EMERGENCY!!"

I'd suggest something more measured like... a little placard that states, "If paper towel dispenser jams, turn dial."

I should run the world.

It's A Good Day.