Tuesday, May 08, 2007

Recycling

I don't.

Comment at will.

Monday, April 09, 2007

Golden Age of SNL

I think I find this funny because the people who are doing the skit just make me laugh.
Billy Crystal, Martin Short, Christopher Guest, and Jim Belushi from 1984. A classic (if you will) from my time. I realize that Anthony and some others were...um...4 years old at the time?

I'd post it directly to the blog, but YouTube is giving me a hard time.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=e8bytZyUNyE

Monday, March 12, 2007

Ah, youth...

I don't know what made me do it, but I picked up my old diary a few days ago- one I kept when I was in junior high... What a freaking riot!

Maybe these are only funny to me because I was there the first time around, but my guess is, they're sort of universally rediculous. Anyway, I thus bear excerpts of my 13-year old soul for our mutual enjoyment:

January 11, 1992
"I used to like this boy named Timmy, who is in my Home Ec class, but now I like his friend William B. He's so cute! (2-cute-2-B-4-gotten). So now, I've decided the people I like are definitely William, Chad, Eddie, and Steve. I don't know which one I love the best, though."

June 6, 1993
"... We were watching this video and it was pitch black otherwise. Once during the night, Chris stuck out his tongue in the dark and said, 'I'm sticking out my tongue, where are you?' I think he wanted to kiss me, but he licked my nose. Argh! So close! OHMYGOSH. I (heart) him! FOREVER."

Brilliant.

Final thought: Why don't we play spin the bottle anymore? The game is sheer genius, folks...

Tuesday, February 20, 2007

All out of right answers

After long hours of studying, sometimes you just don't know the answer. And when you're punch drunk and wiped out, sometimes you need humor so badly that it spills out onto the test. Here are some unbelievable true examples.

If you can't read or see one well, just click on it and a better resolution one should appear. My favorite one, EVER, is the essay response (the second one).












Wednesday, February 14, 2007

You're Neat!

I was at CVS the other day, noticing row upon row of those boxes of kids' Valentines... Harry Potter "Hope you have a *magical* day!" and Pirates of the Caribbean "I choose YOU as my First Mate!" Anyway, looking back, I did get a little nostalgic for those days.

What pains I took in making those out! ...One for everybody in my class. The penmanship had to be fabulous or I'd throw it out and start over. And, whatever hokey, saccharin-soaked message was printed on the front had to be appropriate to the person I was sending it to. You know what I mean, admit it! Every box contained like 4 or 5 messages, and you had to be calculating about it-- It would be social suicide to actually send "BE MINE" to your crush, but you sure as hell couldn't very well give them "YOU'RE NEAT" either, right? What a dilemma. What really cracks me up is remembering what trouble they went to trying to make boys valentines-- Remember G.I. Joe valentines, or Transformers? What a riot.

Anyway, I'm a fan of the e-card, so this is an experiment in sharing an e-card with all of you. The grownup, internet-era answer to the whole-class V-day shout out...

http://www.hallmark.com/ECardWeb/ECV.jsp?a=1052572282861M179128031Y&product_id=

Also, it may make you squirm (as it did me) to see that Hallmark actually makes a "Will You Marry Me" E-card. Wow. Uh, buddy, I think I know how that's gonna turn out... and it doesn't look good.

Monday, February 12, 2007

The Mug.





I've used this mug for almost a year now, I think. A special (she's special, alright) friend made this mug at "The Latest Glaze," a create-your-own-pottery place in Bloomington. She made it, hated it, then gave it to me. Truthfully, I actually love the mug. It is the perfect size for a morning cup of java. It is a pretty decent calorimeter in that the thick mug walls act as a decent insulator keeping the beverage within warm. I also feel good that I am not filling a landfill with daily styrofoam cups. Plus, no matter how crappy one of my projects at work turns out I can always look down at this mug and say, "Things aren't so bad." Unfortunately, I've had to defend my masculinity on an almost weekly basis by using this mug. But I can manage that. I try using the line, "Only a real secure man could drink out of a mug like this." That line gets me only so far. Whatever. And an important note, the design on the mug is NOT floral. They are starbursts, according to the original artist.

Tuesday, February 06, 2007

Heartfelt Apologies Going the Way of the Buffaloes.

People no longer just apologize. There is no such thing as screwing up, admitting guilt, making amends and moving on. In our public society (i.e. celebrities, politicians, etc.), an apology must be accompanied by rehab, counseling and consultation with the appropriate offended group. There are too many examples to list, but here are just a few: Mel Gibson, Mayor Newsom, Mark Foley, Michael Richards, Britney Spears, Joe Biden.

In no way am I suggesting these people do not need counseling or help. Nor am I suggesting contacting group leaders is a bad thing. Both are good things. Both can lead to healing-- both personally and communally. However, my observation is that screwing up and apologizing is no longer good enough. American society demands more. The media demands more. Why? In my opinion, people are so full of shit these days that no one can believe anyone. So when someone gives a true apology, we need the "checked him/herself in" moment to actually believe. What happens when the bar keeps sliding and rehab is no longer enough? Oprah will always have job, getting these people to cry on her couch. Eww.